


I Wish I Could See You

by agoldengalaxy



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Dorks in Love, F/M, Fluff, Unspoken Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:07:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24452611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agoldengalaxy/pseuds/agoldengalaxy
Summary: According to Chopper, Kanan is still awake, even though it’s very late. Hera’d better check on him.
Relationships: Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47





	I Wish I Could See You

**Author's Note:**

> I just finished rebels and I have so many feelings about these two. I just want them to be happy, so here :)
> 
> kudos/comments always appreciated!

The  _ Ghost  _ is quiet, and Hera is glad for it. It means that her crew is getting some rest - and not arguing with each other, which is another plus.

She stretches her arms out in front of her as she glances out the window. The cockpit is dimly lit by the stars that surround Yavin, which is the only source of light now. Beside her, Chopper chirps questioningly.

“Yeah, Chop. I’m going,” she replies with a small chuckle, running a hand over his dome the way he likes it.

He makes a sound that sounds a lot like a purr, and she smiles as she gets to her feet. Her droid is right - she needs to get some rest, especially while things are quiet and peaceful. 

As she walks out into the hall, Chopper rolls beside her contentedly. With no one else around, he is calmer, and of course, he would never dream of upsetting Hera on purpose, so he is quiet now. But as they pass by Kanan’s room, his dome twists slightly, as if looking confusedly.

“What is it?” she asks softly, not wanting to bother anyone, kneeling beside her droid as she glances up at the door. “Do you want to see him? He’s probably sleeping, Chop.”

He chirps, shaking his dome in a ‘no’ motion, telling her that isn’t the case. In fact, Kanan is still awake.

Hera sighs. She can’t say she’s surprised, but really did wish he would think of himself first some days. Smiling lightly down at Chopper, she rubs the top of his dome again. “Go get some rest, Chop. I won’t be long. I’m just going to check on him.”

Chopper salutes her with one of his little mechanical arms, then rolls off to her room to power down. She watches until he disappears around the corner, then stands up straight, turning her attention back to the door. Raising her hand to knock, she steps forward, but the door slides open for her before she can knock.

Kanan’s ability with the Force is something she’ll never understand.

As she had expected, he’s kneeling in the middle of the floor, hands on his knees, his back to the door. She can imagine what his face looks like, though, even without seeing it, even with his blindfold on; the way his nose scrunches a little when disturbed, his eyes opening slowly, waiting to sense who it is. 

But she has a feeling that he knows already.

Taking a small step into the room, a soft smile rises onto her lips as the door slides closed behind her. “Are you alright, love?” She watches as his shoulders release some tension, and he sits up a bit straighter.

“Never better,” comes the smooth reply, and Hera knows him well enough to know that isn’t the case; but then again, when are any of them okay? Not during this war, that’s for sure.

Slowly, he gets to his feet, turning around to face her. She feels her heart flutter, just as it always does and always will when he turns to her. He may not be able to look at her anymore, but he’s still  _ there _ . She steps a little closer. “You should be getting some rest.”

Kanan chuckles, turning his head away for a moment. “I could say the same thing to you,” he responds good-naturedly. “I couldn’t sleep. I thought meditation might help.”

Hera smiles again, finally closing the distance between them. Her hand trails down to his, lacing their fingers together. He lets her, a small grin appearing on his face as he turns it towards their hands. “And is it working?”

“Not really,” he admits, shaking his head. “It’s just…”

“You can’t relax,” she supplies for him, and he nods. “I know. I understand the feeling.” Still, she notices the change in him as he runs his thumb over her knuckles; his shoulders are more relaxed, and there’s still a smile playing on his lips. 

She lets him feel her hand, both taking comfort in the familiarity of it. The quiet doesn’t last very long, because he finally turns his head to face her again. Unknowingly, his eyes are probably meeting hers under the blindfold. “I wish I could see you,” he says again, this time perhaps a bit more longingly than it had been on the streets of Lothal.

A small sigh escapes her, but she squeezes his hand and takes a small step forward, letting go, and reaches up to remove his blindfold. “You could always see me.” She replies with the same thing she’d said before, this time with more confidence. As she tosses the blindfold to the side, he opens his bright eyes slowly, a very small smile on his face.

Hera stares into those familiar eyes, the ones that no longer work, but the ones that had very quickly become like home to her. She almost feels like crying, but she pushes the urge away, and instead reaches up to gently cup one of his cheeks in her hand. Immediately, he relaxes more, leaning into the touch, closing his eyes. His gloved hand reaches up slowly to rest on top of hers, and she smiles as he opens his eyes.

It was so long ago that her father had told her stories of how beautiful it was to have met and fallen in love with her mother, and he’d hoped Hera would have the same experience. In this moment, she thinks she can understand what it’s like.

Before she knows it, she’s lifting her other hand to his other cheek and pressing her lips to his. It’s soft, and sweet, and his hands trail along her back in a way that makes her shiver. It’s exactly what they had been yearning for in that alleyway on Lothal.

It’s bliss; something she hasn’t felt in so long. For a few moments, everything is okay.

They know better than to move past this slow and sweet pace, but Hera doesn’t mind. She never has time to be alone with Kanan anymore, and this is more than welcome. At some point, her hands move, and she rests her elbows on his shoulders, crossing her wrists behind his neck. He smiles and pulls her closer.

But it can’t last forever. They slowly break apart, but they stay in each other’s embrace. Hera opens her eyes to see his looking down at her, and even though they are unseeing, they are full of love. She smiles lightly, moving to rest her head against his chest.

“I guess that was a bit overdue,” she muses, and he responds with a small laugh of his own, resting his chin on the top of her head. 

“My thoughts exactly.”

She closes her eyes, allowing herself to stay here in his arms for a few moments, before clearing her throat. Slowly, she moves to step back. “I should let you sleep.”

Kanan reaches forward, grabbing her hand again. “Hera, I…” he sighs, then turns closed eyes toward the floor. “Stay here. Just for tonight.” He opens his eyes, unknowingly meeting hers. “Please.”

Her heart threatens to break at how quietly and genuinely he’s asking, and even though he can’t see her, she drops her gaze to their intertwined hands. She knows there’s no reason not to, besides the fact that they each have other, more important things to focus on.

But Kanan is just as important to her as her duties. And maybe, at this moment, he’s even more important.

Hera smiles, perhaps a bit sadly, and takes a step forward, squeezing his hand. “Alright, dear.”

His shoulders release tension again, a look of relief crossing his face as he turns, leading her towards the small bunk. It had been a long time since they had spent a night together. Perhaps it’s exactly what they both need.

She lets go of his hand, letting him get situated first. His blindness had taken a toll on him, she knows; but he’d never complained, never once let it get him down. And she loves that about him.

Among many other things.   
  
Nestling herself beside him, he relaxes against her, pressing his face against her neck. She can’t help but laugh a little at the feeling. “Someone’s feeling needy tonight.”

“Hey,” he says with a pout, closing his eyes, “we never get to be alone.”

“I know, love.” Of course she knows. But they are fighting a war, after all, and they have a crew - a family - to look after.

But she supposes they can afford to be a little selfish tonight, especially if it will help Kanan relax and get the rest he deserves.

Her fingers move expertly towards his hair tie, which she delicately removes and slips onto her wrist. He doesn’t respond, but she can feel his smile against her neck. She smiles too, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead, then begins running her hands through his hair.

Things are quiet for a long time. Hera thinks Kanan might have finally fallen asleep, his breath even and warm against her neck, but as she gradually slows her hands, his eyes open a little.

“Hera…” his voice is thick, but he squints toward her anyway.

She feels some spark of hope, though she isn’t sure why. “Yes?”

Kanan blinks, seemingly hesitating for a moment before settling on, “Thank you. For being here.”

“I always will be, Kanan,” she promises, and he relaxes against her again. She can’t help but feel there is something they both want to say; but something is holding them back.

It’s alright. They’re together, and that’s what matters. Besides, they have time. They can’t rush whatever is happening between them.

Hera stops playing with his hair, glancing down to him now. It’s the most peaceful she’s seen him in days, maybe weeks. His lips are slightly parted, where soft and even breaths escape. She remembers the feeling of kissing him and feels a wave of euphoria all over again.

Something compels her to reach forward, gently running a finger along the scar over his eyes. He doesn’t move.

She shakes her head a little, wrapping her arms around him, and lets herself relax, closing her eyes, too. Sleep comes easy.

This is what she’s fighting for. More nights like these; and the opportunity for others to find love like she has. 

She hopes others can be as lucky as she is once the war is over.


End file.
